Rev José Mario O Mandía
jmom.honlam.org
The family is an image of the Blessed Trinity. It is an image of the life of mutual knowledge and mutual love between Father, Son and Holy Spirit. This image is sacred. This is why the devil will do everything possible to destroy this sacred image, this life of mutual knowledge and mutual love. This is why husband, wife and children will have to use both human and supernatural resources to strengthen and to defend their family.
HUMAN VIRTUES REQUIRED
Fidelity in marriage is a human undertaking that calls for the personal effort of husband, wife, and children to grow in all the human virtues – patience, understanding, openness, flexibility, serenity, fortitude, self-control, cheerfulness, thoughtfulness, generosity, humility, meekness, selflessness and so on. Human virtues are practiced in little details. For example, this is what Pope Francis advised married couples in his Letter of 2021: “Think about the advice I gave you on the importance of those three little words: “please, thanks, sorry” (Address to Participants in the Pilgrimage of Families during the Year of Faith, 26 October 2013). After every argument, “don’t let the day end without making peace” (Wednesday Audience, 13 May 2015).
GRACE IS NECESSARY
Moreover, fidelity is a spiritual journey, a journey to holiness, that requires the help of grace. That grace is available in prayer and frequent reception of the sacraments, particularly that of the Eucharist and Confession.
A couple that wants to make their marriage flourish and bear fruit need regular periods of personal meditation and of praying together. “The family that prays together, stays together.”
They also need frequent reception of the Eucharist, “the bond of charity,” which strengthens them to face the challenges of each single day.
They need to experience God’s compassion and forgiveness in the Sacrament of Penance, so that they will have the strength to show compassion and forgiveness at home.
Pope Francis advises, “Don’t be ashamed to kneel together before Jesus in the Eucharist, in order to find a few moments of peace and to look at each other with tenderness and goodness. Or when one of you is a little angry, take him or her by the hand and force a complicit smile. You might also recite together a brief prayer each evening before going to bed, with Jesus at your side” (Pope Francis, Letter to Married Couples, 2021).
SEPARATION OF SPOUSES
It does happen that the relationship may turn difficult. “The Church permits the physical separation of spouses when for serious reasons their living together becomes practically impossible, even though there may be hope for their reconciliation. As long as one’s spouse lives, however, one is not free to contract a new union, except if the marriage be null and be declared so by ecclesiastical authority” (CCCC 348).Regarding couples who have been divorced and remarried civilly (see CCCC 349, quoted in BST 160) the Church teaches the following: “Toward Christians who live in this situation, and who often keep the faith and desire to bring up their children in a Christian manner, priests and the whole community must manifest an attentive solicitude, so that they do not consider themselves separated from the Church, in whose life they can and must participate as baptized persons: ‘They should be encouraged to listen to the Word of God, to attend the Sacrifice of the Mass, to persevere in prayer, to contribute to works of charity and to community efforts for justice, to bring up their children in the Christian faith, to cultivate the spirit and practice of penance and thus implore, day by day, God’s grace’ (Familiaris consortio 84)” (CCC 1651).
(Image: Broken Family by Alejandr-o / Deviant Art)
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